Monday, May 26, 2008

Lions and tigers and bears.. and not seeing the forest for the trees...


Hormones are raging.

Home from TAFE to snarling exchange with GG (who most likely has her own hormonal issues). Decided she doesn't want to "Do" anything anymore at TAFE. Last week we decided that this was ok. She just wants to move out, work, and live her life.


Wouldn't we all????????

She's had a wonderful weekend tripping around the countryside with her friends.
I guess that's 1 out of 3. A request in regard to a job application that SHE was keen on pursuing, and hasn't bothered about, sparked the exchange. Lots of time to spend with friends in the last week, and recovering from said fun. Too busy to due anything of any real importance, it would seem.

She does nothing around the house, including washing up (once or twice a fortnight at most) unless it is nagged out of her. Won't help out by cooking, but will happily cook her self cheesy 2min noodles courtesy of her Pop's fridge and cupboard, an hour before tea time. Doesn't wash up her mess, either. She never puts anything away; you can always see where she's been. Tonight, when I arrived home and commenced cooking tea, I noticed the residual mess from her meal preparation. When challenged (too strong a term, really), about her lack of consideration of other housemates, (ie, me asking why she didn't start some veges for tea since she'd been home for quite a while, rather than just look after herself, she said "fine, I won't eat then". Me, I say, "Well, if you won't contribute to the household, then maybe you shouldn't".. She has lived here with Nanandpop for over a year, rent-free, and has never even lifted a duster or even dreamed about cleaning the bathroom, despite repeated requests on my part. Her bedroom: most likely quarantined by council. She washes her clothes occasionally, and puts them straight into the drier... Hang them on the line? What? That would take effort... She has been continually asked not to smoke in her room, but this has been disregarded as well. A real risk of fire....She always owes Pop money for the utilities. Tonight, I told that she is just a sponge, sucking whatever she can get. I'm over it.
I don't have a problem with her wanting to live "her own life", but with that choice comes responsibility. Such as actually having to pay one's own way, and consider others around you and contributing to the household. She is working 1 or 2 days each week, but is not eligible for benefits as she is a "Full-time"student (that's a joke); I mentioned to her that now that she's not going to TAFE anymore then she can probably register for unemployment benefits but since that entails actually going to Centrelink, which she detests, it's doubtful. And she'll actually have to apply for jobs and attend interviews. And report to Centrelink again.

She just can't wait to "Move out and Be her own person".......... Neither can I. Actually, I thought she did that last year. Except that it's not really all that much fun. Especially when your lifestyle keeps you broke. And you can't get out of your own way to change it.

Growing up sucks. It only gets harder, especially if you do it the hard way.

Anyway, she stomped off to burlesque dancing (in the car that I pay for); she might as well enjoy it while she can "afford" it..........

I hate the way our communication sucks like this, more often than not these days. But I'm tired of repeating myself. And making excuses.

But I know that I'm not alone. And as she says, "at least I'm not doing ice , Mum.....".

And she'd better not either.

Every time I've wanted to publish a post like this one, I've stopped myself out of respect for the feelings of all involved. Tonight, I just decided to..... Actions and consequences.

I'm ready.

And dinner's cooked, so Pop and I will pass a quiet meal together. There's never much to say.

Nite all.



Jen said...

i am with you on most of that. mine are lazy little so-and-so's who will not lift a finger but are the first to complain if things arent their way or done for them. Have been jacking up myself lately. Not babying them. Making them do SOMETHING. although, sometimes it is hardly worth it.

I blame myself. Obviously I sucked at teaching them about respect for others over the years.

Hmmm, will blog my latest story later tonight.

It involves blood.

Not happy me.


Lisa said...

well Jen may have sucked at teaching respect but you didnt and i know that to be the truth.
Cant even begin to imagine what is going on in GG head but for you to ranting like me or Jen, it must be bad.
Sounds awfully like its time to make a huge stand dear cyndy becasue she seems to be getting further away rather than closer to where she should be.

Tough love i guess dear cousin, and i am so glad you blogged this becasue that is what blogging is all about.

I know youa re very bsuy but we must catch up- maybe on the weekend- lunch or tea or something?

Remember that you are not failing as a parent- GG is merely succeeding as a teenstranger.

love you
and understand too

farking kids xx

Anchell said...

Yep. Me too mine. Bloody little bludgers to you madam. Sometimes you have to kick em up the butt with a big boot with nails on etc. Grrrr xxxx

Anonymous said...

one word for you dear cyndy A R M Y... let me tell you, i was a bad teen, and i really wish mum n dad went through with the threat of sending me away to ' boot camp'.. i know kids that did go.. and WOW... did it make a difference..
don't worry.. i have three i been threating too.. and let me tell you, they are off the minute i can get them there if they keep carrying on with laziness.. !!

Anonymous said...

dang cyndy.. what a shame.. i hope it's not something she lives to regret like me..!!
yes, there should be a 'place' we send teens ( especially hormonal ones) to 'get it straight'... what a wonderful world that would be.!!