Thursday, May 10, 2007

My Stardust Memory; the Memory of Love's Refrain

G'Day. Last night I watched an episode of the TV show, "House". No big deal, you may say. You might have even watched this episode yourself. It was the one where a young firefighter is admitted to hospital in a state of confusion and delusion following a collapse a building fire. It is dicovered that he has entered an early menopause as a result of burn grafts to about 54% of his body, including his testicles, which resulted in a hormone imbalance, hence the menopause. Weird enough in itself, but I guess it might happen. But then he it is discovered that he suffers a heart attack every time his lovely young female colleague is around. A broken heart, so to speak, as she is engaged to his firefighter brother, and has a 6 year old child. She was the reason that he ended up with the major burns as he went into a burning building to rescue her, and was caught in a backdraft.....
But this isn't the reason for my post. It was decided that the only way to keep him alive and well, and to treat his heart attacks, would be to prevent them by destroying the limbic centre of his brain with electro-convulsive therapy; shock treatment. The negative effect of this treatment would be the total loss of his memories. His love for the girl, his memories of the girl, his brother, the accident, his training as a firefighter, his parents, childhood, his life...all gone. He opted to go ahead with the treatment.







I guess, my question is, Would you do the same?






Would I?








Are we the sum of our memories? Is the life we live now a consequence of the inner workings of our minds?








We readily acknowledge how our past and the acceptance of of incidences that occurred in our past profoundly effect the lives we live now. The good, the bad and the ugly. The sad, the joyous things. We spend so much of our existence musing about the past, even as children. So many conversations begain with "Do you remember that time when....?" Our memories can give us comfort, can cause us pain. They can amuse us. We can share them.









It is often said ;
"That when all else is gone, at least we'll have our memories....".
Working with people with dementia, I am only too aware how absolutely gut-wrenching it is when this last aspect of what seems to be a link with humanity, slowly disappears. Families and dementia sufferers mourn this loss keenly. When faced with the question of what they would change in their lives, so many people answer "nothing, because I am this person because of the life I've lived, the people I've met, and the experiences I've had".







But for others, maybe the chance to start again with a clean slate may be preferable. No bad memories, nothing to live over and over and over again....... Would there be the levels of depression and mental illness that there are now, I wonder.............................






But to start again as an adult, and not have a childhood.....................................







It would be near to impossible for the loved ones to cope with this of course. There are a lot of people who do live through this; Anyone who is involved with someone with a brain injury of any kind may experience this change of personality and persona. But this is not a choice that has been made; it is imposed by circumstance. So many of our beliefs and social mores are based on the cumulative effects upon our lifes up to this point. How does one have beliefs and opinions with nothing upon which to base them?




Anyway, I'm rambling. It just made me think, that's all.






If it were my choice, I think I would keep my memories.






And for those who didn't see the episode, it was discovered that the firefighter has a tumour... which created false memories... his brother and the young lady were not engaged at all..... chances are that after the tumour was removed, that his memories would have returned to normal.



Maybe he would have even gotten the girl............................


See you all later, C x0x0x0

9 comments:

Bee said...

just visiting to say hi,dont know about all that really..

Kristy-Lee said...

Your life is your memories.
I would keep them, no question.

But then again, I don't have a tumor messing me up!

Anchell said...

hmmmmm....

deep muggle, deep

I would keep them, I already dont remember the stuff I needed to forget!

Kathleen said...

Very thought provoking post Cyndy, reading it gave me goosebumps ...

How many times I could wish "not" to remember my past ... but I am who I am because of them and I would not trade me for anything.

Cyndy said...

And I almost always forget the things that I need to remember...

Yep, Twisty, that's the rub. Poor bloke wasn't really in a fit mental state to make such a decision with that tumour messing his thoughts up... lose-lose situation for him.. in hindsight...

Jewell said...

yes it's a hard one....i think i would do it

Kris said...

Very deep, indeed! I watch House, but have to do it alone, because I can't suspend my disbelief enough not to shout, "Oh, they don't do THAT!" or "That's not how you diagnose THAT!" at the television. I do the same with ER.

poody said...

I hate watching those stupid medical shows where the Dr. is always the hero no matter what! We all know who the real heroes are though! The whole erasing the brain thing reminds me of that Jim Carrey movie about Spotless Minds. I think that if I could I would erase the memory of the Rat Bastard just because I think of him each and every day and it still hurts so much! I guess if there was a way to not erase but block the thoughts that intrude my mind every day. I will be having a nice day and then it will just hit me like a ton of bricks. It pisses me off that I have no control over that at all!I call it my monkey mind! It messes with me sometimes!

Romy said...

Sensationalism !although I do love House......
There had to have been another way.I would have tried something else first. But we only had one hour!